Second Past the Post

From Nancy,

(Comfortably on the couch, with Andrew dutifully typing exactly what Nancy says, and not editing as he goes (OK, maybe only in super stealthy mode...):

Dearest friends,

I will never be able to put into words the feelings of being so loved and cared for that I have experienced in the last month. I am touched on the deepest level, moved to tears of joy and sorrow and I feel everyone's love and support in a visceral way. I've mentioned to a few friends that it's like having the best wake in the world, but I'm still here to hear all the wonderful things people say about me!

A lot has happened in the last two weeks...I completed my five sessions of radiation. I am moved to tears by the courage by several of my friends who have endured 80-90 sessions, which seems impossible and inhuman to me, but they did it. I am in the process of rebuilding my intestinal lining and my strength. I'm looking forward to being able to eat freely and with pleasure - I know that day is coming soon.

Over the next couple of weeks, I have appointments with various practitioners (naturopaths, TCM (Traditional Chinese Medicine) and acupuncturists, Iscador, healers with various approaches, Integral Coaching, etc). As you can see, my journey, like everyone's cancer adventure, will be unique. In a weird way, I am looking forward to it all!

My long term plans, along with my beloved Andrew & Gemma, are to visit the tomb of Bahá'u'lláh in Haifa Israel, and also to go on safari in Botswana. And perhaps make it to the Lotus Temple in Delhi, too...we shall see...

Ma Belle Soeur (my wonderful sister-in-law, who is smart and funny and kind), sent me this aid to visualization which I am now sharing with you:

THE DREAM TEAM

“DEWEY-THE-ALARM”

ROLE:

• Sounds the alarm to startle the Immunity Team and get them into action mode.

“MARG-THE-WARRIOR-PRINCESS”

ROLE:

• ·      Works in tandem with the Acupuncture Team;
• ·      Prods and pokes the Immunity Team into formation;
• ·      Reminds the Immunity Team of their function and responsibility;
• ·      Commands the Immunity Team into action;
• ·      Positive reinforcement being a powerful tool, she smiles while motivating the Team; and,
• ·      Looks good.

“JAMES-THE-HERDER”

ROLE:

• ·      Identifies targets;
• ·      Herds the Immunity Team towards the target;
• ·      Provides the extra “motivation” to the Immunity Team by keeping them on their game plan; and,
• ·      Ensures the protection of the immunity snack shipments to the Team.

So many of you have contacted me with suggestions and information - these are all so welcome, and I thank you for them.  I haven't the time to thank everyone individually, as it would take away from healing, at this point. I look at every suggestion, and feel into my internal filter of what my body and psyche tells me is a "yes".  I'm thankful for each occasion to do. Please know that each one is considered with deep appreciation for your love and concern.  I have been reading your blog comments and emails and listening to your phone messages. Similarly, I am delighted to be in receiving mode, but am unable to respond. I know that you understand this and feel OK about not getting a response from me.

Until the next post, I love you.

Note from Andrew:

Your kindness and solicitude in attending to meals and errands and special requests has been positively impactful at a "life-changing" level. I don't know how we'd do this without you...thank you from the bottom of our hearts. While this whole experience has me plumbing new depths of experience, I am delighted to report that gratitude and letting in caring and love are high on the list of such experiences. There is a sheen of self-sufficiency and competence that has quickly ceded ground to accepting help.

Many of you have asked me how you can help. If there is something specific or practical, please suggest it, or I will let you know. Otherwise, please try this if you feel so inclined: let the heart quality of gratitude and love infuse a moment of "normal" with your close one(s). There's nothing like "losing normal" to suddenly see and appreciate the thread of mystery and awe that is always there if we have open sight to see it and ready hearts to feel it.  It's easy to lose sight of the wonder that is our life in "normal" mode.

I am still working some and travelling for work a bit. Not a straightforward decision (every time), but life has its path, and flowing with it means all of this right now. Besides, quitting everything has a desperate, grasping quality that is unhelpful. So figuring out a balance that works for everyone in this new reality is a much more nimble exercise than "normal"!

With a touched heart and delight in your contact,
A.